Spoiling the wedding

Governor Romney fears that the state will be plunged into chaos and confusion if gay marriages are allowed to go forward May 17 while action on the constitutional amendment banning the marriages is pending. But it is precisely Romney and other opponents of the Supreme Judicial Court decision legalizing gay marriage who are creating the confusion. Without the threatened amendment and the pressure it places on couples who may see only a limited window to become married, there would be no confusion – just the orderly blending of lesbian and gay couples into the mundane bureaucracy of city and town halls.

The governor ought to stop fomenting uncertainty and begin taking steps to ease the process forward. Attorney General Thomas Reilly deserves praise for declining Romney's request to seek a stay of the high court's ruling until the amendment process has run its course.

Less laudable is the attorney general's reliance on a 1913 law to prevent couples from other states from getting married in Massachusetts. Doing this would be a selective application of the law, since it hasn't been enforced in other cases where state marriage laws differ, such as age requirements or the right to marry first cousins. Vermont does not deny civil unions to same-sex couples from out of state, proving it is possible to accommodate other jurisdictions without creating undue chaos.

The logic behind Romney's insistence that gay marriages must be stopped to avoid harm and disruption is similar to the position of some opponents who profess concern for the children of same-sex unions. The stigma created by bigotry and discrimination is what can harm the children of gay couples, not the fact that two parents are of the same gender. Social opprobrium also once greeted adopted children, stepchildren, and even the only child, not to mention the children of interracial couples. It may be too much to expect that gay families will become ordinary any time soon, but the furor continually stoked by opponents can't help. The logic behind Romney's insistence that gay marriages must be stopped to avoid harm and disruption is similar to the position of some opponents who profess concern for the children of same-sex unions. The stigma created by bigotry and discrimination is what can harm the children of gay couples, not the fact that two parents are of the same gender. Social opprobrium also once greeted adopted children, stepchildren, and even the only child, not to mention the children of interracial couples. It may be too much to expect that gay families will become ordinary any time soon, but the furor continually stoked by opponents can't help.

'Freedom to Marry Rings' image upper right © H. Mitchell.